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Of course, I will. I am in love with him. Love? Yes, I love him. I know nothing about him. I’ve never even laid eyes on him, but I love him. So just how fucked up does that make me? And what in the hell am I supposed to do about it?
Obviously, I can’t tell him. He will think I am some desperate crazy woman. Men like him don’t love anything but themselves. Even though I feel he cares about me in some way, something makes me believe he cares for me, but I should have known with a man like him that I’m nothing more than a possession. Simply said, I’m just a shiny new toy that he’s no doubt grown tired of and now wants to move on to another.
Oh God!
My stomach violently twists and turns in agony.
Another one.
What if he is already looking to replace me after our contract is up? The thought of him fucking someone else rip my heart in two. My stomach wrenches again at the thought and I barely make it to the bathroom in enough time to throw up.
These are going to be the longest and most torturous two days of my life.
Jaxxon
She is so stunning. I can’t help but admire her from afar. Standing in the side hall, I watch as Blaire kisses her mother goodbye and leaves. I know her routine quite well by now. She arrives here around 8am and leaves around lunchtime to volunteer on the pediatric floor. Every day from 12:30pm—1:00 pm you can find her reading books, coloring, finger painting, or playing dolls with the sick kids on the floor. The kids adore her. I understand completely. I adore her, too. I like kids a lot. I have just never given much thought of having any. Not until her, anyways. She has shaken me to the core, opening my eyes to see a life I never thought possible.
She’s done the impossible. She taught me to love.
Blaire Michaels has brought sunshine into my fucked up dark world, but that sunshine can’t last forever. It only lasts for two more days. Then the luminous, dark cloud that has hovered over my life will return. Even though he remains quieter these days, the demon inside me still lives. She doesn’t deserve to be with someone as screwed up as me. Blaire deserves a happily ever after with someone that won’t corrupt her. In just the past ten days, I’ve felt I’ve done just that.
“Good afternoon, Ms. Michaels” I say as I knock lightly on her mother’s hospital room door.
She beams me a smile as bright and contagious as her daughter. With her dark, wavy hair framing her youthful face, I can see so much of where Blaire gets her looks. Her twinkling green eyes are inviting and calm. Just like her daughter.
“Oh, please come in, Mr. Ryder. It’s so good to see you!”
When I hand her the huge vase of colorful tropical flowers, her smile grows even wider.
“Oh my goodness. They are so beautiful!”
Just like your daughter.
“Thank you so much! These are my daughter’s favorite.”
Blaire. My Blaire. I will order her a room full.
“You are very welcome. How are you feeling?”
“So much better. I’ll be even better once I get back home. My daughter has been working so hard to get everything ready for me. She even moved us into another place. One where the elevator actually works,” she says, laughing. A pang hits me. I hate they’ve had to struggle so much.
Blaire.
“Well, I know you need your rest, so I won’t bother you. Ryder Technology wanted to check in to see how you are doing.”
“Please, Mr. Ryder, have a seat.”
Hesitantly, I sit down in the chair next to her. Glancing nervously at my watch, I know I don’t have long before she returns.
“Mr. Ryder, I just want to thank you for everything you have done for me. The past couple of years have been a real struggle for me, and unfortunately for my daughter, too.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. Maybe now things will be better for you both.”
“Mr. Ryder, if it weren’t for your company’s generosity, I would never have been able to get this surgery. My daughter has worked so hard at her night job trying to save enough money. But no matter how hard she has worked and saved, there just never is enough money. My Blaire is so young and beautiful; she shouldn’t have had to quit school to come home to take care of me.”
My sweet Blaire. I am so sorry. I didn’t know.
“She sounds like an incredible woman. I know you must be proud of her.”
“I’m more than proud of that girl, Mr. Ryder. I just hope this will give us both a fresh start. Maybe now she can start living her life again. She deserves someone to take care of her.”
I am going to take care of her. I promise.
I can take no more. I never dreamed Blaire’s life has been so hard. It’s no wonder she’d gotten so angry with me when I moved her out of her apartment and into the new one. She’d felt like I had put her down.
God, I‘m such a fucking piece of shit!
I hear Blaire laughing with a nurse in the hallway and so I make my excuse to leave.
“I really need to be going, Ms. Michaels.”
“But Mr. Ryder, I wish you’d stay. My daughter, Blaire, will be here shortly.”
“I’m sorry. Please send her my regards. Good day, Ms. Michaels,” I say hurriedly, rushing out the door.
Turning the corner, I collide into her. Everything happens around me in slow motion. Her silky, long, ebony waves swipe across my face, hypnotizing me with the scent of her delicious cherry smelling shampoo. My hands catch the sides of her arms just before the soft drink in her hands crashes against my chest, soaking my suit and her shirt.
“Oh my God! I am so sorry!” she apologizes, concern shining in her eyes.
Fuck me! Those eyes of hers! I could never deny her anything staring into them. Unlike mine, hers are bright and clear. They are not hazed by the dark. Heartbreakingly, they do have a hint of sadness and worry in them. Something I will do my damnedest to erase.
Her touch is more than I can handle. Pushing her away, I storm off down the hallway to get away from her while I still can.
Blaire
Drenched in my drink, I head to the ladies room to try to dry myself. Yanking the towels out of the dispenser, I curse him loudly as I turn to chunk my busted cup into the trash bin against the wall.
“What an asshole!” I exclaim, trying to absorb some of the drink out of my shirt with the paper towels.
What the hell is his problem? Does the man not know how to say a simple, “excuse me” or “I’m sorry”?
Don’t mistake it; I’m more than thankful for what his company is doing for my mom. But why does the man have to treat me like this? And better yet, why is that when I am near him, I feel so drawn to him. My body reacts to him in ways I’ve never experienced before. One look into those chocolate eyes of his and I am lost. He is like a magnet to my soul.
After standing in front of the hand dryer for a few minutes, I walk away with a dry but coke stained shirt. When I finally get back to my mom’s room, she is asleep. Instead of hanging around, I decide to go for a walk. Maybe I’ll head down to the local market and pick up another cheap shirt or something.
The day is bright and sunny. It does nothing for my foul mood. I want this day to match how I feel, dark and stormy. I can’t figure out how my life has gotten so fucked up all because of two men. One, who I can’t get out of my head, and the other, who is a complete stranger.
What girl in her right mind would sell her body to another man? What girl would allow someone to do the sick things he does to me? What girl would love it so much?
That girl is me.
The time has gotten away from me while I’ve sat here on this wooden bench. This little park is one of my favorites in the city. Joggers run past me on the track and children laugh from the nearby playground. I wish I could be that carefree again, that innocent. I don’t think I ever had the opportunity to be. I have always had to worry about someone else.
My phone from Mr. R chirps beside me.
Mr. R: 2934 W. Baker Street, 15 minutes
Baker Street
? That’s right across from me. What the fuck? This stalking shit is seriously going to have to stop.
Grabbing my purse from beside me, I leave the park entrance and cross the street. Looking up at the buildings, I scan them for the correct address. When I finally reach it, I’m confused. There is a for sale sign on the front of the building with tall brown weeds growing up near the sidewalk. Pushing open the iron gate, I hesitantly approach the front door and peek inside. Knowing that he is expecting me to be at this address, I reach for the doorknob and discover that it is unlocked. Nervously, I walk inside the dark foyer and reach for the light switch. When I flip the switch, nothing happens but a click. Trying the one on the adjacent wall does me no good either.
“Hello?” I call as I walk more into the heavy darkness ahead. I hear nothing, but creaking wooden floors beneath my feet.
“Hello?” I repeat myself, still with no answer. Reaching for my phone, I swipe the screen to text him back. I’d been so preoccupied with my message that I hadn’t notice the door behind me close. It locks. I am grabbed from behind. Energy swirls all around me, growing and building like a vicious cyclone. I inhale his spice scent and relax against his strong chest. Instantly, I am no longer afraid.
Jaxxon
I need to let her go.
I need her.
I’d tracked her phone using the GPS app on mine. I know she is still nearby.
When I left the hospital, I’d circled this block at least twenty times before I’d laid eyes on an old building for sale. Its darkness intrigues me and draws me in. When I approach the broken windows, I peer inside and an idea overtakes me. It isn’t hard for me to reach through the broken glass of the door and enter.
I wait in the darkness. I love it here. My demon calls to be fed and I desperately need to feel her in my arms every bit as much as I need air to breathe. I’d only given her 15 minutes to get here. There is no way I can wait any longer than that. My cock stands at full mast waiting to impale her. This time with her will be anything but sweet.
“Hello?” I hear her voice call from the front entrance.
My demon smiles.
Again, I hear her call out into the darkness.
“Hello?” This time there is a bit of terror in the way she speaks.
I love it!
Waiting for her to come in my direction, I stand beside the door. I see her shadow move closer. The heat from her body can be felt as she walks past me. I breathe her in and make my move.
Blaire
“Raven,” he whispers in my ear. The way he says it makes me tremble with anticipation.
I turn to him in the darkness. I can’t see anything at all. Reaching up towards his face, I slide my hand across his cheek, and then lift the other up to do the same. Tenderly, I trace across his forehead and eyes, trailing my fingertips down to his lips. His hot mouth sucks my finger inside, triggering my clit to begin pounding in my panties. A loud moan escapes my mouth, and he releases my finger, hissing through his teeth.
The demon is awake.
I catch him by surprise when I don’t submit to him. And for the first time ever, I take his control away.
Jaxxon
I have it all planned out what I am going to do to her in the dark. The thrill of it has me high. When she jumps into my arms, something snaps. Wrapping her long legs around my waist, her pussy pulls my cock to it with a relentless magnetic force. Blaire’s lips crash to mine and I stumble forward, gripping her ass underneath her skirt. With a hard thud, her body slams against the wall behind her, knocking the breath out of her panting chest. Pressing the full weight of my body against her, I pin her tightly to the wall. My hands find the strings to the sides of her underwear. With one violent jerk, she is free. With one hand, I shove my pants down, dropping my boxer briefs with it. I don’t have to see if she is wet because she always is. Cupping her plump firm ass in my hands, I shove her down as I thrust up. Her hot tight folds grip me with dear life on entry.
I’m in fucking Heaven.
Over and over, I thrust up into her. Dropping my head onto her neck, I begin biting her skin.
Blaire’s nails violently tear at the skin on my back, causing me to bite harder into her skin.
“FUCK!” I yell as she begins rocking her hips in perfect sync with me.
She feels so damn terrific.
“Please. Don’t. Stop!” she utters, struggling to catch her breath.
“Say it, Raven! Tell me to fuck you harder. Tell me what you want.”
“Fuck me harder. Please, Sir.”
Her words unravel me. All my emotions, the rage, the confusion, the hunger… I impale it in her. There is no doubt in my mind that we are busting the sheetrock behind her. Her back will be covered in bruises tomorrow, I’m sure.
“YES! OH. GOD. YES!” Her loud screams bounce through the open room.
Then just when I think I have gained back control of this, she takes it away once more.
“Slow. Please, Sir, I want you to go slow.”
Blaire
Nothing has ever felt as good as him fucking me against this wall. His hard cock slamming into my insides will inevitably leave me walking funny for the next day or so. But right now, I don’t care if I ever walk right again. I want him to fuck me. Never could I have imagined the sensations that are rippling through me right now. My orgasm finds me with vengeance, leaving me gasping and desperate for more. Beads of sweat drip off his face and into my mouth as his forehead presses to mine. His salty taste is delectable.
“Slower. Please, Sir, go slow,” I ask.
Immediately his forehead lifts and his thrusting stops.
What is he doing?
His salty lips find mine; his teeth bite hard against them, drawing blood. My pussy throbs harder. Mr. R’s hot tongue swipes across my mouth, taking the blood with it. And then he starts moving, giving me slow, tender strokes. I feel every single ridge of his long thick cock rake against my inner walls. The building down low begins. Holding on for dear life, I wrap my arms around his neck and tighten the muscles in my thighs.
Mr. R’s pants grow louder. The smell of our arousal fills the darkness that surrounds us. His long, torturous thrusting teases my sweet spot and I know my release is near.
“Come with me, please,” I beg him, placing my mouth over his. Our tongues slowly roll around one another, tasting the other’s soul a bit more.
“Yes! Oh God! YES! AHH!” I scream and he presses my ass hard with his hands.
“FUCK! FUCK!” He follows my release.
He releases his grip and steadies me as my feet touch the floor. My knees nearly give way, but his arms are there to hold me up.
He doesn’t speak for a long time. All I can hear is the rustling of clothes and the familiar sound of a zipper.
Say something. Please.
His warm palm cups my cheek.
“What are you thinking? Tell me.”
“I’m thinking I don’t know your name. I don’t know anything about you.”
“My name is Sir. We are almost to the end of our agreement. There is nothing more to know.”
“I don’t want this to end.”
There. I have told him. It is the truth.
Fuck this stupid contract.
Fuck this dark room.
I just want him to admit he cares about me.
“This is business, Raven. I am sorry if you can’t understand that.”
“This is more than fucking business, and you know it!”
He remains quiet for a few seconds and then lets out a loud sigh.
“Raven, we both got what we wanted. I’m sorry if you believed there was going to be more to this arrangement.” He walks across room and out the door.
I want to run after him into the sunlight to expose him.
But I don’t. I stay in the dark alone and cry.
Day 13
Jaxxon
I come into work today with vengeance. I hate the world and I hate everyone in it. Everyone, but her, that
is.
Blaire.
Since I left her yesterday afternoon, I haven’t eaten, slept, or stopped thinking about her. Not even for one goddamn second. She made me lie about how I felt. Why can’t she just prove me right? Love isn’t real. Someone always gets hurt. I will eventually hurt her and I’ll never allow that to happen. I’ll kill anyone who ever tries to harm her, and that includes myself. I’d just as soon ram a knife into my own heart than know I caused her any more pain in her life.
Storming into my father’s office, I catch him in mid thrust, Chloe’s ass bent up in the air, my father’s head thrown back. It is revolting to see. This is my example. All my life, this is who has shown me how to treat women. He is nothing but a fucking sorry excuse for a father.
Chloe looks back around at me and smiles. I could’ve had her multiple times in the past, but I have grown tired of my father’s sloppy seconds. My father roars his release inside her and backs away. The smug satisfied smile on his face sickens me.
“Next time lock the fucking door, Chloe!” my father barks at her when he sees me standing there. He pulls his pants back up, adjusts his suit, and pats Chloe on the butt as she leaves.
“What do you want, Jaxxon?” he says, perturbed.
I have to get out of this town for a while. Far away from Blaire.
“The Holbrook account. I want to take it over.”
“Kent can handle it. Besides that, it would require you to work out of the London office.”
“Yes, I know that, but I would like more responsibility. I think I have proven myself capable of that already.”
“Fine. I will speak to Kent about it this afternoon. However, I warn you, if you fuck around over there, I’m not bailing you out of trouble. Understand?”
What an asshole!
“Yeah, I got it.”
Slamming the door behind me, I can feel the blood boiling inside. Stacy picks the wrong fucking time to follow me in my office, pointing her finger in my chest.